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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Bernie Brewer Enters Rehab

Mets Blob Exclusive! Bernie Brewer admits to sending lewd sex-ting pics to the Chorizo Sausage. "The drinking was a factor," Brewer confessed. MLB reached out to Dr. Drew Pinsky on behalf of Bernie to see if the celebrity rehab specialist could help. Pinsky commented, "I'd be happy to help, but it won't be easy to break his level of addiction. Remember, Bernie has been known to use a giant slide to enter a swimming pool full of beer." 
When asked if the recent scandal involving NYC Congressman, Anthony Weiner, inspired his digression, Bernie frankly answered, "I have never been inspired by Weiner...Sausage is what inspires me. It always has, and I fear it always will."


  1. The tragedy in this whole mess is how Mr. Brewer betrayed the Bratwurst. I grilled the Brat about it and he was jumping out of his skin he was so hot. He was particularly upset because Bernie had given him, and I quote, "The best handlebar mustache kiss I'd ever had."

  2. Well Cleon's Van, you really know your sex scandals.

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