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Friday, October 14, 2011

Nelson Cruz was drafted by the Mets


Nelson Cruz was first drafted out of the Dominican Rebuplic by the NY Mets. In 2000 he was traded to the A's for the worst hitting SS in all of baseball, Jorge Velandia. Velandia posted a .000 batting average in his time with the Mets. The trade has come to be know as the "Steve Phillips is too busy banging a very talented intern-while focusing on potential of banging the other very talented intern-to notice Nelson Cruz was a very talented baseball player."


Last night after Cruz hit a 100mph Justin Verlander fast ball out of the park, Mets Blob can certainly see how Phillips would have no use for a clutch-power hitting-outfielder-with a cannon for an arm. We all now know poor Steve Phillips' decisions were clouded by the disease he was suffering from. Phillips is now an admitted sex addict. Sex addiction is an affliction that only affects rich and powerful men. Poor men can have this disorder but they are never classified as sex addicts. The classifications used for men of lower socioeconomic backgrounds are: philanderers, scumbags, horn dogs, cheaters, and home wreckers.

If the Mets had kept Nelson Cruz they would have never had to sign that hump Jason Bay.

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