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Sunday, June 26, 2011

Josh Hamilton The Blue Eyed Devil

The Prince of Darkness
Josh Hamilton says his blue eyes are to blame for his awful stats in day games. Before going 0-4 with 4K's Saturday and sitting out Sunday's game, Hamilton was hitting .122 in day games and .374 under the lights. In an exclusive interview with Mets Blob, Josh explained that he has always had keener vision at night: “I’m not kidding Blob, I could be driving like 110 in the pitch dark and spot a crack whore rolling off a park bench. It was super-vision man. I once tattooed the Budweiser logo on a fat chick’s ass in total darkness - free hand - with a butane torch and a toenail clipper. It came out perfect, dude. Of course, this was years ago - before I liked Jesus so much. But, sometimes I slip up and I find myself searching for Jesus in a sweet pair of c-cups covered in blow."
"Lord hear my prayer. Uno mas Tequila por favor!"

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